Black Roses

The black roses smell so much sweeter

On the other side of this door

I wish you could only see them

But you've foresaken them all with me before

Entwined with the black roses in your garden

Suffocating in the lies that said I loved you then

Pulled under ripped and torn apart

Perishing in your eyes with heart

In the dark is where only I can grow and breathe

Beyond the pain and the lies that bind me

To this world of misconception of raining tears

To the words that fall out of your mouth I wish I could believe

I kiss the thorns that rip and tear

Bleeding eternally with a darkened disguise

Trapped in this thing we call life

Falling helplessly, screaming through my eyes

I use to say "I guess your right I suppose"

I'll lay dead in your garden of black roses

You said you loved only what was beautiful

Held and crushed in your hand that slit the throat

Killing the love that burned in your hellish fire slowly

Drowning me in the blood in which only you seemed to float

Entwined with DARKEST black roses in your garden

Suffocating in the lies that said I loved you then

Pulled under ripped and torn apart

Perishing in your eyes with my heart

In the sweetest black roses breathes

Only a love that will never be

*inspired by the song "i dont want to be me" by amanda clemens

I'm struggling here to breathe

I'm struggling here to be free

Free me from all this pain

I fear just everything here is has driven me insane

I'm trying so hard to be good

I just wish someone understood

Why I do the things I do

I'm just trying so hard, if only you knew

I seem to be so unlucky

I seem to be suffocating and hurting

But you don't understand this pain

You don't understand how much of me remains

I'm trying so hard to put away the knife

Trying to find a reason to live this gloomy life

I wish someone could offer me a cure

Right now I'm just not feeling so sure

You don't know how much I wish I wasn't me

But you don't care, as long as your happy

Crying every tear with every cut

I fear I'm stuck here, Stuck in this rut

Trying so hard to be happy

But I don't want to be me

I don't think you'll ever fucking get it

Because of you, your a story on my arm, your another slit

Who would look at this worthless face and say they loved me

No one sees the pain in my eyes, they don't see me crying

I'm just another person here to blame

I'm another to ignore, hurt, and hate. Look At What I've Became!

I'm trying so hard to stay here

But no one really cares

If I decide to run

Will you come after me or am I just done?

Trying so hard to just breathe

Trying so hard to not leave

Trying so hard to be happy

But I'm sorry

I don't want to be me

It was dark and lonely. Another stormy night.

A girl feeling she was only a reason for her parents to fight

She runs up to her room and locks her door

Her parents assume she's alright so they just ignore

She cradles herself on the floor crying

She feels like she's by herself, she feels like she's dying

She feels like shes at fault for everything

Her mother always telling her she's nothing

The girl reaches into her closet only to pull out something bad

She also pulls out some paper to write a suicide note so sad

Holding the blade, the reflection showing past memories

She holds it to her wrist sliding it, at this she was an expertise

The tears mix with the blood that seem to fall so endlessly

She cries, "I'm Sorry", she cries it so helplessly

She felt no one really cared, as if anyone else was faking it

She says the names of anyone she once loved with each and every slit

The last cut so deep, she sheds her last and final tear

The note laying beside her saying "It wasn't a lie. I told you I'd disappear"

She was mommy's little screw up angel

And not to forget daddy's little broken girl

The pain's coursing through these veins ever so fast

My mind is pounding with memories of the past

I wipe away these tears that fall endlessly

I cry so no one hears. I cry so silently.

Running in the dark, the cold numbing the skin

About to fall away forever, I fear this may be the end

My love differs from any other because mine is unique

Its a bounding love that everyone in other people seek

I hold the people that are dear to me close

Close to my heart, closer than most

Once they fade away I die more and more inside

I try to stay strong and smile. The pain I must hide.

So I lie awake at night only to hear my merciful cries

The dreams kill me slowly, so maybe by morning I'll die

It won't matter because I'll end up alone

Breaking down, falling apart without you there at home

The days are getting colder

But don't mind me, go on as you were

I'll just stand here

I'm downright falling like these tears

I ask why must I cry

I just wish I could lie here and die

No more warm embrace for her

She's lost without him

But go ahead, go on as you were

If I start falling faster

Will you be there to end my fatal disaster

I guess I'm just dreaming

You'll be there forever to wipe away the tears streaming

I ask myself why, why must I cry(cry)

Why do I give up everything just for this guy

But there's no more home for her

She can't forget him

But go ahead, go on as you were

I told myself I would never let go

Its too unbelievable she seems to fall like snow

Endlessly it piles up inside

It hurts not just her but everyone to see her cry

Why, Why does anyone cry?

Its just something you want to hide

She's lost without any answer

She cries she loves him

But don't mind me........go on as you were

Go on as you were

Forget all about her

She's fine she tells herself

Secretly hurting inside herself

She seems to be filled with lots of questions

She's lost without a friend

Waving goodbye

Why must I cry?